5 good reasons why you should buy Leslie a beer...

1. Beer is good for my health (yours too). Beer is healthier than milk. (click to see proof)

2. Beer is simple to understand. There are only two types of beer. (click to learn why)

3. Beer connects you to history. Beer is the oldest man-made alcoholic beverage. (click to learn more)

4. Beer sets an example. The first consumer protection law ever written was enacted over beer by Duke Wilhelm IV of Bavaria in 1516. It was a purity law limiting the ingredients of beer to barley, hops and water.

5. Beer is romantic. In Babylon, over 4000 years ago, it was customary for the bride's father to supply his new son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the 'honey month' – or what we know today as the 'honeymoon'. Babylonians believed if the groom drank mead for an entire month, it enhanced the chances of his wife bearing a male heir. Drink beer and be more virile. It's good for the prostate.

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Beer Philosophy

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large, empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things- -your family, your children, your health, your friends, your favorite passions ... things that, if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

"The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car.
The sand is everything else--the small stuff".

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Go play at the beach. There will always be time to clean the house, and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers."

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Beer & Yeast

• Drink your lagers cold. Your ales should be drunk only slightly cool. Of course, that's only my opinion.

• Yeasts, by the way, are single celled fungi. Yes, relatives of the Amanita (the magic mushroom) and ergot (the rye fungus that produces LSD).

• Ingesting yeasts/fungi tends to affect one's perspective of the world and thus, one's opinions. Some day, I will write a book on the subject and call it, "As a Man Drinketh".

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Beer vs. Milk

As you can readily see from the above comparison chart, the only thing, that is good for you, that milk has in greater quantity than beer is Vitamin B2. And milk contains many things that are bad for you, whilst beer can only ever be criticized for containing alcohol. The infamous beer belly? Come on now. Get a grip on reality... a pint of beer has only 150 calories and zero fat, while a pint of milk has 200 calories and 16 grams of cholesterol laden fat.

Oh yes, you might jump in to say-- milk has calcium. BUT, all independent studies show that regular milk drinkers actually have less calcium in their bones than non-milk drinkers, so you get less than zero benefit from the calcium in milk. You cannot digest it. Drinking milk actually leeches calcium from your bones. Want calcium? Eat your vegies. And beer has more magnesium and potassium, both of which are necessary to make use of the calcium you get from any source.

So forget that bowl of cereal with milk. Eat some spinach. Wash it down with beer. You can skip the corn flakes. After all, beer is made from cereal. You'll be both healthier and happier; a little closer to having what you really want out of life... to be healthier, happier, wealthier and wiser.

Additionally, 75% of the people on this planet are lactose intolerant. 75% of allergy sufferers' symptoms disappear when they stop ingesting milk and other dairy products. Less than 15% of people are allergic to beer.

Beer helps to prevent cancer and heart disease. Milk helps to cause cancer and heart disease. Beer helps to prevent Alzheimer's and Dementia. Milk helps to cause Alzheimer's and Dementia. If, after reading this, you still think that milk is good for you, you might consider the possibility that Dementia has already set in. Wipe that mustache off your face and put on a smile instead... have a pint of beer today.

I plan to; in fact, I think I'll go crack a cold one right now.

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